I am at my wit’s end. I will never understand society. Scratch that. I will never understand people in general. There is so much hate and snap judgments being thrown around everywhere I look. When did we all become so cruel, uncaring, and vile? Have we always been this way?

We judge people on their skin color, where they live/were born, their physique, their wealth, or lack thereof, their principles, whether they put pineapples on their pizza, use Hotmail as their email address, or own a flip phone. Now, I have been guilty of a few of these as I am no saint, most particularly the food ones. Having a laugh with some friends about someone eating something differently than you do may seem harmless, especially when said person is not there, but what is the point? Why do we love to bash others for being different? A lot of us were raised not to judge a book by its cover, yet so many of us do. So what if someone does something differently than you do. If it is not hurting you directly, there is no need to tear that person down over it.

The internet and social media are the worst when it comes to this. People love to bash others and backseat comment how someone should be living their life. Whatever you do, do not go down the comment section of a post, inflammatory or not. See, I have come to realize, it does not matter if the post was intended to be a positive post or not, the comment section is sure to be filled with plenty of hateful words and judgmental reactions. For whatever reason, whether it is the anonymity of the internet or knowing you probably will never see that person in real life, people become so emboldened online and say things that I can only hope they do not ever say out loud to someone’s face. Unfortunately, civil conversation seems a lost art.

And then there are all these inane societal norms that people are magically supposed to know and follow, like no double posting on Instagram, only send a snap to a person or your story and not both, do not wear white after Labor Day (is that really a real thing, or do people just say it?), and numerous other fashion don’ts and such. Is there a fully compiled list somewhere? Did I miss the memo when it went out? Seriously, does anyone know how these unwritten rules even start, and more importantly, why do we blindly follow along with them and judge others that do not? Don’t get me wrong, I like to keep an open mind, but when people are saying “do this because everyone else is”, that is not going to convince me. At least show me some facts or studies about why I should or should not be doing something. Otherwise, I will die on that hill.

Tupac once said (and a bunch of others, I’m sure), “Only God can judge me.” If only that were so. Cause when I look around, all I see is judgment. There is so much of it in the world, and it only serves to drag everyone down. Would we not be better off by lifting others up? (I will answer that for you – yes, we would!) And to clarify, because I know some people will take it this way, but I am not talking about being nice to everyone no matter what. Some people, sadly, do not warrant our kindness (looking at racists, nazis, murderers, rapists, etc.). And that is their own fault. If you are in a position to educate someone and possibly change their mindset (ie. racists becoming less so) then, by all means, give it an attempt. If you have the opportunity to attend a counter-protest against marching Nazis, then let’s go. I am talking about everyone else in our daily lives that we encounter online or in person.

I am no saint like I said, but my mindset has been changing in regards to this. I have noticed it as I feel myself becoming increasingly annoyed at what I read and how I see others treated, myself included. If someone wants to judge me for something I do that does not affect anyone else in a negative way, well I feel sorry for them for having such a negative mindset. It is not going to stop me from doing what I do. No, I will not bow down and conform to inane social rules or anything else that does not make sense. My former coworker and I had a sign in our office that read, “Here’s to the rebels.” That is a mantle I will gladly wear any day.

What I am asking of you all now is to examine your words when you say them and the tone in which you use. Understand the person whom you are talking to. Engage in civil discourse. Take the high road instead of stooping to their level. If someone is consistently nasty to you, cut them out of your life so you are not tempted to meet them with the same. Toxic people will weigh you down if you let them, so do not give them the time of day. Instead, focus on living your best life. I believe we can all treat each other better. We can start by seeking to understand each other instead of attacking first. I am not perfect. I have many flaws and am guilty of some of what I have written about above. I definitely could stand to work on taking the high ground more often. So please do not feel that by saying all of this that I am implying I am better than you or attacking you. I am not. Read these words as they are. If they resonate with you or you find yourself feeling defensive, then pause, take a step back, and really think about why that is and what that means to you, instead of focusing on that these words came from me. Writing it all down and sharing it with you helps remind me to be better as well.

So you may be thinking, “Man, Shawn, did something happen to set this diatribe off?” Well, yeah, kind of, but honestly it was not any one thing, but a culmination of a lot of things that I have witnessed and read over the past year. And personally, I have dealt with this my whole life. I have been looked down on, received a lack of respect and appreciation from others, and am often not taken seriously. Now some of that is my fault, but a lot of it is not. It is tiring always having to fight to be heard, appreciated, and most importantly, understood. I take joy in being myself. We are all unique and should embrace that. Individualism is something I learned about at an early age. In fact, I can still remember this one Power Rangers episode that dealt with conformity and losing your individual self (and maybe that is where I initially learned about it) where everyone was wearing the same exact outfit and doing the same things. I could tell that was bad that people were not themselves, and that has stuck with me all these years. My hope is that everyone learns that themselves. I long to see a world with multiple cultures not only co-existing together peacefully, but learning from and growing with each other. Our differences can help us achieve greatness. And frankly, the future of our world depends on it. We are not going to last much longer if we all do not learn to get along together and treat each other humanely.

So here’s to the rebels.

The lyrics for this post’s title came from Childish Gambino’s 3005