“There is an unspoken bond you create with the people you travel with.” 

Kristen Sarah

What a busy Fall I have had. My work travel schedule is always jam-packed between September and November, and then this year I decided to sneak a quick personal trip to Nashville in right during the middle of it. It was a bit draining, especially since I drove down and back (a 12-hour drive each way!), but it was so worth it. I rode a Bird around town (electric scooter you can rent), took the obligatory Nashville tourist picture with the wings, enjoyed some authentic Southern food, and walked around some of the nature parks. But the best part of my trip were the people I spent it with.

My internet friends. It is what we jokingly, but accurately, call each other. Makes it pretty awkward trying to explain to people about how we know each other. But I’ll lay it out for y’all real quick. We were all part of this news group online. There are about 13,000+ people in the group and multiple side groups for specific topics (ie. the Marvel discussion group). However, out of those 13,000+ people, there were only about maybe 200 people that were not white. So to have a place where we could all talk a little more openly without worrying about offending others, we created our own side group (there’s currently about 130 of us). And then we started meeting up in real life. I know, I know, stranger danger and all that.

“Strangers are just friends waiting to happen.”

Rob McKuen

But you see, something miraculous happened. We all started bonding with each other. It was like we all had known each other forever. Some of us even felt like family. Our various backgrounds and cultures blended together seamlessly. Black, Native American, Mexican, South American, Jamaican, Asian, South Asian, Gay, Straight, Bisexual, Muslim, Mormon, Jewish, and Christian (and others I’m sure I’m forgetting). The people that lived near each other started having meetups to get to know each other better. And from there it progressed to brunch meetups in DC, casual hangouts in NYC, Friendsgiving in Nashville, and so many other meetups in between.

Now, like the main group, this side group is mostly women. I am one of five males in it, currently. I have always felt more comfortable around women, so it does not bother me, but also, these women teach me so much and I am so grateful for them. They are strong, intelligent, fearless, independent, real, resilient, and from all walks of life. They have opened my eyes to more of the world.

My circle growing up was mostly white. I knew a lot of black kids and was friends with some of them, but I was not close to any of them. My dad and stepdad (both black) were in the picture here and there growing up, but it was mostly my white mom and grandma who raised me. And so here is one of those reasons why the internet can be a beautiful place. It has allowed me to meet and befriend these women who have taught me so much about their worlds.

And that is what more of the world needs, for people to experience other’s cultures. To understand their upbringing. To know and see them as humans, with their own strengths and faults, their own likes and dislikes, their own hopes and dreams. 

So befriend people that do not look like you. Get to know them and their experiences. Travel to places you have not been before. It does not even have to be another country. Nashville is quite different than rural PA, and Miami is different than Detroit, which is different than Oklahoma City, which is different than Bangor, Maine… you get my drift. It is a whole different world out there. Visit these other places, experience different cultures and lifestyles in person, and talk to the people that live them. Ask lots of questions, but be sincere about it. It takes an open mind to learn and a closed mind to remain blind.

If you have Facebook, please make sure to follow my new page, Standing In Doorways!

The lyrics for this post’s title came from Childish Gambino’s Pink Toes